I got my heart broken, once again. Whose fault? Mine. Just mine. I’m not blaming anyone. It was thanks to me. If I just stopped it early on, I wouldn’t be hurt this way. And besides, he never knew. He never knew how so far down I have fallen. So there you go, my fault.

Love is choosing the same person over and over again even when he hurts you every time. Blind love, I know but isn’t love supposed to be that way? I know, not always. But how else could I love someone who is not mine in the first place? That’s what’s wrong. I always love a person from a far, in secret; I don’t tell him. Why should I? Unless he professes his undying love for me, maybe only then. That’s wrong I know. I should do something; take the first step. Maybe so, maybe not.

Why don’t I take the first step? Because one, I am not ready to be rejected and two, I am not ready to be hurt. But I still hurt myself in the end. Stupid, right? I know, I am stupid bordering on crazy. That’s just how love is for me.

But I figured out one thing, however love will hurt me, I decide to fall again, at some point. So maybe, I still believe in love. Because love is real; it’s not a bad thing, it’s real, real, real. I believe in real love. I believe in true love. I may have thought it was you but I knew it wasn't.

Maybe someday I’d read this and laugh about it because I was wrong or right; whatever. Love is real. I believe in falling in love and finding you in the crowd. I will find you next to me.